I'm struggling lately. There, I said it.
Here's the deal, I think....
I'm a perfectionist, I don't think that's a big secret to anyone who knows me. When I do something, I want to do it perfect. And I want to do it as fast as possible. While in some ways that is good because I've always been a good student and employee....in other ways it can be very unhealthy for me. For anyone.
I talk a lot about being a mom, being a wife, being a friend, and being a coach.....but today I really want to focus on the coach part - and my own personal journey through that.
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So let's back up a little bit.
Last July I had just finished my first challenge group as a challenger and I was in love with the process, with the coaches, and with the inspiration in the group. I saw the positive affect my coach was having on so many people, myself included....and I knew I wanted to do that same thing. I knew that I wanted to be my own boss, drive my own success and most importantly - help others to change their lives and their health the way that I had....and most importanty to FEEL as good as I felt.
So I became a coach and I hit the ground running. In my personal journey, I started with my first program, T25 and started drinking Shakeology in May. I completed that program and then moved on to do PiYo, ChaLEAN Extreme, 21 Day Fix, Insanity Max: 30, 21 Day Fix Extreme.....and then I was just started P90X3 but my knee injury happened again so I had to calm it down a little. Now I've decided that since I've been doing dedicated programs since last May, I just wanted to take some time to pick and choose between the TONS of programs that I have so I could just kind of do what I felt like for a little bit.
I've been committed and dedicated to a workout schedule since last May...so for 11 straight months I was dedicated to following something. I have grown more and more in love with working out and some days I probably do a little too much. It's hard for me to admit that, but I know it's true.
After I hurt my knee, I've just kind of felt like I'm in a funk. A funk because I can't work out as hard as I want to. A funk because I still struggle with food.
EVERYONE - PLEASE READ: Just because I'm a health and fitness coach and I work out almost every single day - does NOT mean that I don't struggle with food. For some reason over the last month this has been a huge issue for me. It's so hard to admit because as a coach, I dont want to let anyone down. I'm supposed to be the example. People are supposed to look up to me for advice and to follow what I'm doing, right?
But as much as I want to be the example for people - being honest and real is much more important to me. I struggle along with my challengers. I do my meal plans and I follow my meals - but sometimes I am an emotional/stress eater and I "binge" so to say. I'll eat too much to the point that I feel physically sick. Why do I do it? I have no idea. Because I'm human probably. Because it's not easy for me either. I'll have really good weeks where I feel great and I have great results and then I'll have a few weeks where I have some not so good days with some not so great choices and my results kind of go away.
But I keep working at it. I keep working out and I keep making the healthiest choices that I can MOST of the time. And the biggest part is - learning to be OK with NOT being perfect. The obsession of being perfect is what drives us crazy....myself included, especially over the last month. Following the 80/20 rule is so important in living a healthy lifestyle. You have to give yourself a break sometimes and just do the best you can.
Tonight I had kind of a revelation. I don't need a chiseled body with a 6 pack stomach. I feel great and I am healthier than I've ever been in my entire life. I need to be happy with that and stop feeling bad for not being better. Whatever "better" means. I do think we are always a work in progress. We are going to have triumps and we are going to have setbacks...but being real with ourselves through the journey is what is most important.
So I'm sharing this because I feel it's SO important for everyone to know that it's not just easier for some people. Don't think you can't do it. You will struggle. You will have good days and you will have bad days because this is life. Real life. You will have stressful days where you don't make the best decisions. But God gave us 24 hours in a day. One day at a time. And that is how we need to take our journeys. As long as we are always working on doing our best - that is the most important thing.
I want people to know that it's ok not to be perfect. I want myself to know that. And I really need to do a better job of giving myself a break. I can still be a great coach and lead people towards a healthy lifestyle even when I'm not perfect. ESPECIALLY when I'm not perfect.
Thanks for reading my mish mash of thoughts - and I really hope it can help others in their personal journey...to know that you aren't alone.
